Happy Birthday, Bob

Today in 1833, in Dresden, New York, Robert Green "Bob" Ingersoll was born.

Ingersoll was most noted as an orator, the most popular of his age, when oratory was public entertainment. He was stunningly popular as a speaker, given that his most popular subject was agnosticism; many attacked him as a blasphemer, but crowds paid the then-huge sum of a dollar to hear him advocate free thought and attack organized religion.

Ingersoll enjoyed a friendship with the poet Walt Whitman, who considered Ingersoll the greatest orator of his time. "It should not be surprising that I am drawn to Ingersoll, for he is Leaves of Grass... He lives, embodies, the individuality, I preach. I see in Bob the noblest specimen--American-flavored--pure out of the soil, spreading, giving, demanding light." At the poet's death, Ingersoll delivered one of the great panegyrics.

Ambrose Bierce's satiric Decalogue contained this Second Commandment: "No images nor idols make/for Robert Ingersoll to break."

His obituary said

Ingersoll was one of the most eloquent public men of the present day. He was a lawyer of pronounced supremacy and was held in the highest esteem in the courts of his country. There was no office in the gift of his people that he could not have obtained but for his pronounced antagonism to orthodox Christianity. A man of unimpeachable morality and uprightness, honest in all his dealings, overflowing with generous impulses, Ingersoll set his face against the teachings of revelation and, as his spare moments permitted, conducted an energetic warfare against the Church of Christ.

And he said, among other things:

You can't be bad enough to cause an earthquake, neither can you be good enough to stop one.

You can find more about him here.

Happy Birthday, Robert

Today in 1833, in Dresden, New York, Robert Green "Bob" Ingersoll was born.

Ingersoll was most noted as an orator, the most popular of his age, when oratory was public entertainment. He was stunningly popular as a speaker, given that his most popular subject was agnosticism; many attacked him as a blasphemer, but crowds paid the then-huge sum of a dollar to hear him advocate free thought and attack organized religion.

Ingersoll enjoyed a friendship with the poet Walt Whitman, who considered Ingersoll the greatest orator of his time. "It should not be surprising that I am drawn to Ingersoll, for he is Leaves of Grass... He lives, embodies, the individuality, I preach. I see in Bob the noblest specimen--American-flavored--pure out of the soil, spreading, giving, demanding light." At the poet's death, Ingersoll delivered one of the great panegyrics.

Ambrose Bierce's satiric Decalogue contained this Second Commandment: "No images nor idols make/for Robert Ingersoll to break."

His obituary said

Ingersoll was one of the most eloquent public men of the present day. He was a lawyer of pronounced supremacy and was held in the highest esteem in the courts of his country. There was no office in the gift of his people that he could not have obtained but for his pronounced antagonism to orthodox Christianity. A man of unimpeachable morality and uprightness, honest in all his dealings, overflowing with generous impulses, Ingersoll set his face against the teachings of revelation and, as his spare moments permitted, conducted an energetic warfare against the Church of Christ.

And he said, among other things:

You can't be bad enough to cause an earthquake, neither can you be good enough to stop one.

You can find more about him here.

Words from Robert Ingerosll - 16

Thousands of young men are being educated at this moment by the various churches. What for? In order that they may be prepared to investigate the phenomena by which we are surrounded? No! The object, and the only object, is that they may be prepared to defend a creed. ... Honest investigation is utterly impossible within the pale of any church for the reason that if you think the church is right you will not investigate, and if you think it is wrong, the church will investigate you. The consequence of this is, that most of the theological literature is the result of suppression, of fear, of tyranny, and hypocrisy.

Plea for Individuality and Arraignment of the Church - 1873

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 15

Is it desirable that all should be exactly alike in their religious convictions? Is any such thing possible? Do we not know that there are no two persons alike in the whole world? No two trees, no two leaves, no two anythings that are alike? Infinite diversity is the law. — Religion tries to force all minds into one mould. Knowing that all cannot believe the church endeavors to make all say that they believe. She longs for the unity of hypocrisy, and detests the splendid diversity of independence and freedom.

Nearly all people stand in great horror of annihilation, and yet to give up your individuality is to annihilate yourself. Mental slavery is mental death and every man who has given up his intellectual freedom is the living coffin of his dead soul. In this sense every church is a cemetery and every creed is a epitaph.

Plea for Individuality and Arraignment of the Church, 1873

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 14

Over the vast plain called life we are all travelers, and not one traveler is perfectly certain that he is going in the right direction. True it is, that no other plain is so well supplied with guide-boards. At every turn and crossing you find them, and upon each one is written the exact direction and distance. One great trouble is, however, that these boards are all different, and the result is that most travelers are confused in proportion to the number they read. Thousands of people are around each of these signs, and each one is doing his best to convince the traveler that his particular board is the only one upon which the least reliance can be placed, and that if his road is taken the reward for doing so will be infinite and eternal, while all the other roads are said to lead to hell, and all the makers of the other guide boards are declared to be heretics, hypocrites, and liars. "Well," says a traveler, "you may be right in what you say, but allow me at least to read some of the other directions and examine a little into their claims. I wish to rely a little upon my own judgment in a matter of so great importance." "No, sir!" shouted the zealot. "That is the very thing you are not allowed to do. You must go my way without investigation or you are as good as damned already." "Well," says the traveler, "if that is so, I believe I had better go your way." And so most of them go along, taking the word of those who know as little as themselves. Now and then comes one who, in spite of all threats, calmly examines the claims of all, and as calmly rejects them all.—These travelers take roads of their own, and are denounced by all the others as Infidels and Atheists.

In my judgment, every human being should take a road of his own. Every mind should be true to itself; should think, investigate, and conclude for itself. This is a duty alike incumbent upon pauper and prince. Every soul should repel dictation and tyranny, no matter from what source they come—from earth or heaven, from men or gods.

Plea for Individuality and Arraignment of the Church, 1873

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 13

The only good is happiness; and the only evil, is misery or unhappiness. Only those things are right that tend to increase the happiness of man; only those things are wrong that tend to increase the misery of man. That is the basis of right and wrong. There never would have been the idea except that a man can inflict suffering upon others.

—Religious Intolerance, 1879

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 12

Does an Infinite Being need to be protected by a State Legislature? If the Bible is inspired, does the author of it need the support of the law to command respect? We don't need any law to make mankind respect Shakespeare. We come to the altar of that great man and cover it with our gratitude without a statute. Think of a law to govern tastes! Think of a law to govern mind, or any question whatever!

—Human Rights

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 11

You can't be bad enough to cause an earthquake; neither can you be good enough to stop one.

Out of that wretched doctrine and infamous mistake that man's belief could have any effect on nature grew all these inquisitions, racks, and collars of torture, and all the blood that was ever shed by religious persecution.

—Human Rights

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 10

In my judgment it is the duty of every man to think and express his thoughts; but at the same time do not make martyrs of yourselves. Those people that are not willing that you should be honest, they are not worth dying for, they are not worth being a martyr for, and if you are afraid you cannot support your wife and children in this town and express your honest thought, why keep it to yourself, but if there is such a man here he is a living certificate of the meanness of the community in which he lives.

-Intellectual Development

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 9

The gentlemen who hold views against mine, if they had any evidence, would have no fears - not the slightest. If a man has a diamond that has been examined by the finest lapidaries of the world, and some ignorant stonecutter tells him that it is nothing but an ordinary rock, he laughs at him; but if it has not been examine by lapidaries, and he is a little suspicious himself that it is not genuine, it makes him mad.

Any doctrine that will not bear investigation is no fit tenant for the mind of an honest man.

Intellectual Development

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 8

Notwithstanding the fact that infidels in all ages have battled for the rights of man, and have at all times been the fearless advocates of liberty and justice, we are constantly charged by the Church with tearing down without building again. The Church should by this time know that it is utterly impossible to rob men of their opinions. The history of religious persecution fully establishes the fact that the mind necessarily resists and defies every attempt to control it by violence. The mind necessarily clings to old ideas until prepared for the new. The moment we comprehend the truth, all erroneous ideas are of necessity cast aside.

For the vagaries of the clouds the infidels propose to substitute the realities of the earth; for superstitions, the splendid demonstrations and achievements of science; and for theological tyranny, the chainless liberty of thought.

Gods

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 7

The instant we admit a book is too sacred to be doubted, or even reasoned about, we are mental serfs.

Gods

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 6

Strange! that no one has ever been persecuted by the church for believing God bad, while hundreds of millions have been destroyed for thinking him good. The orthodox church will never forgive the Universalist for saying "God is love." It has always been considered as one of the very highest evidences of true and undefiled religion to insist that all men, women, and childre deserve eternal damnation. It has always been heresy to say, "God will at last save all."

Gods

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 5

I think we came up from the lower animals... Now, when I first heard that doctrine, I didn't like it... I hated to believe it. I don't know that it is the truth now. I'm not satisfied upon that question; I stand about eight to seven. I thought it over. I read about it... And finally I said, "Well, I guess we came up from the lower animals." I thought it all over, the best I could, and I said, "I guess we did." And after a while I began to like it, and I like it now better than I did before. Do you know that I would rather belong to a race that started with skullless vertebrae in the dim Laurentian seas, wiggling without knowing why they wiggled, swimming without knowing where they were going; but kept developing and getting a little further up and a little further up, all through the animal world, and finally striking this chap in the dugout. And getting a little bigger, and this fellow calling that fellow a heretic, and that fellow calling the other an infidel, and so on. For in the history of the world, the man who is ahead has always been called a heretic. Recollect this! I would rather come from a race that started from that skullless vertebrate, and come up and up and up and finally produced Shakespeare, who found the human intellect wallowing in a hut and touched it with a wand of his genius and it became a palace dome and pinnacle. I would rather belong to a race that commenced then and produced Shakespeare, with the eternal hope of an internal future for the children of progress leading from the far horizon, beckoning men forward, forward and onward forever. I had rather belong to this race and commence there with that hope, than to have sprung from a perfect pair, on which the Lord has lost money every day since.

The Liberty of Man, Woman, and Child

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 4

[T]he object of every religion ever made by man has been to get on the good side of supposed powers; has been to petition the gods to stop the eathquakes, to stop famine, to stop pestilence. It has always been something that man should do to prevent being punished by powers of the air or to get from them some favors. It has always been believed that these ghosts could in some way be appeased... Under these conditions progress was almost impossible. Fear paralyzed the brain.

Progress is born of courage. Fear believes, courage doubts. Fear falls upon the earth and prays; courage stands erect and thinks. Fear retreats; courage advances. Fear is barbarism, courage is civilization. Fear believes in witchcraft; courage in science and in eternal law....

Take from the church itself the threat and fear of hell and it becomes an extinct volcano. With the doctrine of hell taken from the Church, that is the end of the fall of man, that is the end of the scheme of atonement. Take from them the idea of an eternal place of torment, and the Church is thrown back simply upon facts.

The Ghosts

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 3

I believe in the gospel of this world; I believe in happiness right here; I do not believe in drinking skim milk all my life with the expectation of butter beyond the clouds. I believe in the gospel, I say, of this world. This is a mighty good world. There are plenty of good people in this world. There is lots of happiness in this world; and, I say, let us, in every way we can, increase it.

The Ghosts

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 2

Life is a narrow vale between the cold and barren peaks of two eternities. We strive in vain to look beyond the heights. We cry aloud, and the only answer is the echo of a wailing cry. From the voiceless lips of the unreplying dead there comes no word; but in the night of death hope sees a star and listening love can hear the rustling of a wing. He who sleeps here when dying, mistaking the approach of death for the return of health, whispered with his latest breath, "I am better now." Let us believe, in spite of doubts and dogmas and tears and fears that these dear words are true of all the countless dead.

Elegy at the Funeral of Ebon C. Ingersoll

The idea of immortality, which like a sea ebbs and flows in the human heart, beating against the sands and rocks of time and fate, was not born to any book, nor to any religion, nor of any creed. It was born of human affection, and it will continue to ebb and flow beneath the mists and clouds of doubt and darkness as long as love kisses the lips of death.

The Ghosts

Words from Robert Ingersoll - 1

A new occasional series - quotes from Col. R.G. Ingersoll's 44 Lectures Complete: enjoy!

Now they say that [the Bible] is inspired. I do not care whether it is or not; the question is, Is it true? If it is true, it don't need to be inspired. Nothing needs inspiration except a falsehood or a mistake. A fact never went into partnership with a miracle. Truth scorns the assistance of wonders. A fact will fit every other fact in the universe, and that is how you can tell whether it is or is not a fact. A lie will not fit anything except another lie made for the express purpose; and, finally, someone gets tired of lying, and the last lie will not fit the next fact, and then there is a chance for inspiration. Right then and there a miracle is needed. The real question is, In the light of science, in the light of the brain and heart of the nineteenth century, is it true?

Mistakes of Moses