Man Sues Church After Prayer Is Granted

This is funny. This is very funny. As our local news station reports, Matt Lincoln should have heeded that old saying about being careful what you pray for:

A Sevier County man is suing his former church in South Knoxville, after he claims he was overcome by the spirit, fell backward and hit his head.

Matt Lincoln, 57, says pastors at Lakewind Church should have made sure someone caught him. His attorney is asking for $2.5 million to cover medical bills, lost income and pain and suffering. The case stems from a Wednesday night service at Lakewind in June 2007, when a visiting minister was praying for members individually.

"I just closed my eyes. I was just asking God, I wanted to have a real experience. It's like you faint. It's almost like you pass out," Lincoln says. He also says that wasn't unusual. "I've fallen out in the spirit before, but have always been caught," Lincoln says. "I always trusted that the catchers would be there because they always were."

This time, he says, was different. "I hit. I hit full force backwards," he says.

After one year and two surgeries, Lincoln says he still hurts all the time. "It's pain in the back and it goes down my legs," he says. Lincoln says he only decided to file a lawsuit when his claim for medical bills was denied by the church's insurance company. ...

Lawyers for the church didn't want to go on camera, but say in an answer to the lawsuit that Lincoln was observed that night by other congregants to be on the floor laughing, that he failed to look out for his own safety and that court involvement with the ministry of this church would be unconstitutional.

So, to recap: Lincoln prayed for "a real experience," one that makes "you faint" and "almost... pass out". And he got it - he "fell out in the spirit" and "hit full force backwards". A terrifically "real experience". And now he's suing the church, because God cracked him over so hard.

Oh, he says it's because "pastors at Lakewind Church should have made sure someone caught him", but how are they to anticipate the way the Lord will work? Maybe people were 'falling out in the spirit' left and right and there couldn't have been enough catchers to cover them all - I mean, what if the catchers 'fell out in the spirit' too? Sounds to me like it's his God he ought to be suing; his God's the one who slammed him full force backwards onto the floor with nobody there to catch him.

And his pain and suffering? I don't doubt it's real, like his lost income and medical bills. But isn't it the will of his God? Surely if his God had wanted to slay him in the spirit he could have done it without injuring his body. Lincoln should be looking for the purpose here, not seeking someone to blame. God's will, after all, is done, isn't it? This is just another of those mysterious ways, one of those crooked lines with which God draws straight.

Or, deep down, doesn't Lincoln believe? Does he understand how stupid it is to keel over backwards onto a hard floor? Probably he's not starting to agree with those Christians who argue that "being slain in the Spirit" is not Christian, but Satanic in origin - or those who point out that the phenomenon of so-called "religious ecstasy" is seen in many religions around the world - Yoga, Hindi, Buddhism, Sufi Islam, Wicca and other pagan and neopagan traditions - as well as in secular settings.

What's crystal clear here is that he doesn't accept that what happened to him is the will of his God, even though it's pretty much exactly what he prayed for.